orphaned no more

With all the buzz about adoption in November and tomorrow being Orphan Sunday my heart is full and empty all at the same time.

I am so filled up as I watch little Macy and her life change and grow.  As I watch our Heavenly Father restore her life as she grows in Him I am humbled as her mom and amazed as His daughter.  What a mighty God we serve.  As God reveals His redemption plan through watching orphans become sons and daughters in families around me, I stand in awe.

My heart and soul feel empty as I look at pictures from my recent Africa trip and miss their little faces.  The more time that passes, the more empty I feel.  Miss playing with them.  Miss their giggling.  Miss Joseph.  Miss Rose.  Miss Susan.  Miss Jonathan.  Miss Lillian.  Miss Solomon.  Miss Alice.  Want to hold and love on them again so I can feel that joy and peace again.

I know God is stirring in my heart these 2 vast opposites.  Things that are close to His heart come from Him.  This once would have left me wondering what the reason was for these experiences.  For these emotions.  What will be the end product?  Another adoption in our family?  Another trip to Africa?  More?  But He is teaching me that the hurt mixed with joy is the plan.  It is enough.

The gift of adoption intertwined with the longing to be with the orphaned.  It just is what it is.